Yesterday was one of those days where I wanted to post a star on the fridge, give myself a pat on the back, or enjoy a 7-11 slurpee. For the first time in quite awhile I felt like I had accomplished so much within a day. I don't know why but this years winter has been really hard me, maybe the fact of living closer to the mountains=more snow and definitely lots of cold. Maybe it's that we live in a basement apartment or as I call it 'the cave' and hardly see the sun light. Or that I hate my wardrobe but can't afford a new one and wont buy new clothes until I shed some weight. With all of the negative around me I had continued to forget about the positive around me. As much as I some times HATE being a one car family and having to get up early to take Ryan to work if I need it that day and having a curfew of 3:00 to pick him up, and take him to and from school I'm grateful we even have a car. Even more grateful that when I purchased that car on my 23rd birthday I paid cash for it. Yay for no car payments! Being a one car family means I GET to take Ryan to work and see him that much longer, I GET to take him to school and pick him up occasionally. The ugly cold snow means more water which our state is always in need of.

Yesterday was a great day. I had time to myself and read some of Stephanie Nielson's book Heaven is Here. WOW, how incredible humbling to read her story.
I played with my sweet MJ, I did laundry AND put it away (for some reason I can do all the laundry in the world but have the hardest time of actually putting them away) I was out of the house before noon to walk around the block with Mary. We explored and found pine cones, threw rocks which she found to be the most hilarious thing ever. We ate lunch and then it was time for her to nap and me to continue my cleaning. One day we will live some place where her bedroom isn't right next to the kitchen.
I held a Mary Kay class, and helped a friend do a make over for her Young Women's group. They taught about taking care of your outer beauty as well as the importance of your inner beauty, your spiritual beauty. Such a great lesson.

It may not sound much to you, even as I'm typing this and reading as I go I know it really isn't much. But to me it felt great. I was proud of myself. I felt accomplished.

In a short amount of time of going to a Mary Kay conference and to learn to try to give up my fears, having chats with my husband late at night, family prayer, reading Stephanie's book, and this glorious warmer weather actually seeing and feeling the sun again I feel like I am gaining myself back. Baby steps.

There is negativity all around us in this world and I have held on to it far too long. I am now going to try to always look at the bright side of things in any situation. I may not love our little cave, or my post baby body, my old wardrobe/shoes, the numbers in my bank account. BUT at least I have a warm home to live in with every thing I need, I have a beautiful working body that allows me to do anything I set my mind to. I have many clothes and shoes to choose from and we have money in the bank to pay bills, feed our family and are not in debt. I have so much to be grateful for.

15 months

It's amazing how much this little girl is growing and learning at only 15 months. She is the most gentle, sweetest, sensitive, and smart little girl. I am completely enamored by her and love watching her play. This afternoon I laid her down for a nap and did she fall asleep? nope. But she did have the time of her life sitting in her crib playing with her stuffed animals and dolls haha.

Today was a fun day, we started out by going to the library with our neighbor who lives above us, our girls are just a month apart. They had a blast playing around and reading books. Ryan didn't have school tonight so we took advantage and spent tonight as a family and went swimming.

At 15 months:
She wears; size 3 diapers, 4 shoes, 12+ month clothes.

Loves:
'Pinky' the jaguar and 'tiny' her mocha baby doll and nameless blondie baby. Animal crackers that her Grandpa O bought for her at Costco, reading books, trying to copy what mom and dad say. She loves to come into our room to turn on my iHome and dance to music. Loves her sleep and typically goes to bed between 8-9 pm and wakes up 9-10 am. and takes 2 naps each day. It's awesome. I have a couple of friends who just had babies and she absolutely loves them! She'll be gentle and touch their arms and heads, so stinking cute. She is my little helper she will help me vacuum and throw things in the garbage when I ask her and as of this week helped unload the bottom part of the dishwasher haha.

Hates:
Not getting her way and has learned to hit! being with out her binky, being in cool water (we went swimming and it took her about 15 minutes to get used to it) still isn't a fan of drinking cold milk so I always have to warm it up for my little princess. The girl knows what she wants! :)

My little luv bug

Oh how this little girl holds my heart, she is just so much fun and bring so much joy in to our family. Cupid brought some gifts for her; pinky the jaguar, play necklaces and bracelets, and big girl cups/plates/utensils. She found the jaguar while we were out shopping one afternoon a couple of weeks ago and she would not let that thing go. She is just in love with it along with her baby dolls. It is so fun having a girl!

Mary is almost 14 months old and she is constantly changing and growing up so fast!

I weighed her with me on the scale and she is 20 pounds.

She can sign for milk! So exciting to finally see her grasp on to what we are teaching her. She loves to be read to, play kid apps on my phone, she is such a little smarty pants and knows how to use my smart phone haha!

She loves to play with toys that she can stack on top of each other or put  in/out of a bucket. I used an old large wipes case and cute most of the rubber part off (where the wipes are pulled out of) and thanks to my mom and sister they saved a ton of lids from juices, milk, other drinks that I can put in side and she will just sit forever pulling them out and putting them back in through the hole. Why do we buy our kids toys?! So funny how entertained they can get by the smallest things.

She is very much a mama's girl. Every morning we'll bring her in to our bed and play with her and she always cries when I get up and leave the room or even just to stand up.

She's not a picky eater and will try everything but just like us some days she isn't in the mood for certain foods which makes it hard some days because I have no clue what she wants and she'll just spit out her jam sandwich or throw her green beans on to the floor. lil stinker.

Is such a good listener and will walk back to us when she has wondered off, is very vocal and quite the little chatter box. She will jabber than be silent waiting for some one to finish talking than jabber again like she is have a regular conversation with that person.

Hates:
being told no and still some times cries, being put in her car seat at time and will do a back bend basically so she isn't strapped in.

Loves:
healthy green drinks! naturally loves candy and chocolate ect. She is in love with music and dancing and knows how to turn on my iHome.
Baby Einstein, Sesame Street, anything with music she loves it.
She'll bob her head up and down to the beat and shake her hips talk about our little entertainer.

Her hemangioma is slowly but surely going down wahoo! her hair is becoming to look like a mullet but it sure enough is getting a bit longer! maybe in another 6+ months I can do some little piggy tails haha. And she is our brown eyed blonde haired girl, so stinking cute.

the little moments

Some times as a mom you go through out your days trying to stay on a routine, trying to catch up on your home, have a hot meal for your husband to have when he gets home from a long day, to take care of yourself. And at times you forget to take in the small moments of what it is to be a mom. Yesterday as Mary would wine each time I would get up from the floor beside her trying to fold clothes, pick up her room or try to sneak in the kitchen to load the dish washer I finally gave in and just sat next to her watching her play. She would bring me a book and sit on my lap wanting to turn the pages herself. She wasn't paying attention to the mess around us, my hair that was in desperation of needing a style, and face with no make up on. All she wanted was her mom holding her reading stories and playing together.

I need to remember to not complain when she is being a mama's girl and wont let me out of sight, that these moments wont last forever. The laundry can wait till later, she isn't embarrassed by my lack of hair and make up being done (yet). To take in every cuddle and and I just melt when those chubby little hands reach up for me to pick her up.

So blessed and grateful to call this sweet girl my daughter, I must have done some thing right in my life to deserve to be her mom.

With walking comes being on a whole new level of curiosity and new findings

Caught in the action! Her favorite is to get in to the pantry and pull out the cake decorating sprinkles and shake them. She also will grab out the dish towels and 'wash' my pans she pulls out under the sink haha!

I have just been awful about taking pictures... With all of the hype and excitement having a toddler for the holidays I have just been enjoying the moments and not remembering to capture them.
Thanksgiving day we spent with Ryans family at his grandparents home and than had our own Thanksgiving the following day with my family. Which of course I didn't take pictures at either place. Fail.

We spent Christmas Eve at my parents home, she was spoiled with clothes, pj's, and toys.
Ryan and I were spoiled with money, ps3 players and Just Dance, Food Processor, the new Batman and ALL of the Harry Potter dvd's! We had a bomb Christmas.

So here are the few pictures of our walking girl opening her Christmas gifts. That's right she is a full on walker now! So flippin cute watching her be able to walk and explore on a new level.

Her smiles kill us, she has such a cheeser smile I love it. She so far has two teeth on the bottom and top showing with a tooth coming on it's way from both top and bottom a long with a couple of molars!
Teething time is so fun..  
I can't wait till she is done teething!